smack! i need prozac!

To the overly concerned parents of soon-to-be-admitted-freshmen:

Two words: Settle. Down. Take your Prozac before talking to me on the phone. Speak calmly. Don't cry, fret, tear up, or worry. Will your son/daughter find out soon? Yes. How soon? Very (and no, that does not mean I know the exact minute decisions will be released. If I knew that information, I would be paid a boatload and a half more than I earn right now). Do I know if your son/daughter will be admitted? I could tell you, but I would have to shoot you.

*Insert me smacking my head against my desk here*

In short, PATIENCE, IAGO! You'll find out soon enough. I honestly hope the best for you. And please don't blame me if you are not accepted. Like I said, I'm not paid enough to have that kind of power.

Best wishes,
Jessica

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